It's gray outside. There's a distinct chill in The air and the smell of burning leaves from off in the distance even though I'm in the middle of the city. The leaves are burning red and yellow and orange with color and the intensity is a stark contrast to the dull look of the sky. If you listen to the breeze, it's quiet, but it speaks of colder days, different times, a window in to something more.

I love fall, and I love music. And for some reason, this song makes me think of fall and everything about it. It's melodious and melancholy and quiet and soft and colorful and thoughtful.

I haven't been around LiveJournal, well this journal, a lot lately. I've had this odd disconnect with LJ for almost a year now and that doesn't seem to change. I'm not sure what it is. I think it has a lot to do with fandom trends and people being in to different things, which makes me feel out of the loop. But I also think it's because I've been here for a really LONG time. I've had this journal for a long time. Sometimes it hits me just how long I've been here, and I'm like, what the? Where does the time go?! I never think about just deleting my journal, not any more. I still check my friends list every day and try to keep up with all of my friends and comment when I can. But I don't know how often I will post here. I don't really have much to say right now. Maybe it's just a really LOOOONG phase! Who knows?! Maybe I've grown out of this journal. I hope not. I'm working on shifting my point of view. Maybe it's because I haven't gotten in to Tumblr and Twitter and all of those other places where people have kind of migrated. Maybe when I get my new camera I just start taking as many pictures as possible and posting like, a picture a day. Or maybe i should just start writing SOMETHING every day, even if it's not important to anyone but me. Maybe, it's a challenge of sorts.

So, what's been going on lately? That is the question. In the time since I've been around LJ, I have missed my dear friend aoineko's birthday, which I hear was fabulous AND one of my oldest and dearest friends pumpkin25 has a huge birthday coming on on TUESDAY! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANANANABANANA!

I am still dating, maybe not dating, that boy that I talked about last time I updated my journal. It's still confusing and I am no closer to answers than I was the last time I talked about it. Which probably says a lot about my capability to actually maintain any kind of healthy relationship. I'm not worried about it. I think this time, said person has just as many issues as I do, so I am not entirely taking the blame for the lack of progress on that front. I feel like, as a girl (SORRY BUT IT'S TRUE), I have the right to want to be pursued just a little bit...maybe? Call me old fashioned. Whatever.

I haven't seen any good movies recently. I haven't really seen anything at all except for Paranormal Activity, which was great for Halloween. And I watched Drag me to Hell last night, which was terrible on all fronts.
I still want to see so many movies that are out right now, but finding the time or making myself take the time to go, has proven difficult lately!

On the TV front. I like Glee...it's enjoyable and cute and pretty. AND HAS COMPLETELY TAKEN OVER MY FRIENDS LIST. COMPLETELY. I mean, this show is seriously EVERYWHERE. I like it, but I feel like I missed the boat somewhere because i definitely don't LOVE it as much as the rest of the world seems to. Don't get me wrong. I like it a lot, but love? Maybe not completely. That and Vampire Diaries are the only new shows I'm watching. VD (As I like to call it because it kind of is like a VD), is amusing and entertaining and I plan on keeping up with it. I dropped One Tree Hill like the bad habit it became. Otherwise, I've just been sticking to my old favorites. Supernatural (this season has been great), 30 Rock (FINALLY BACK), It's Always Sunny (NEVER GETS OLD. I love it more now than I did the day we met), The Office (sometimes...not so interested any more), and that's really it outside of my favorite Ghost Hunting shows. OH WAIT...did I forget to mention Gossip Girl? Yeah...Gossip Girl is still my number one love. Why? I don't' know. Probably because I must be stupid and a glutton for punishment.

Speaking of Gossip Girl though, I really should just say a few things...
( Rufus and Lily got married...OOPS SPOILER!!!!!!! )

But lets be honest, it doesn't really matter. Blake Lively is pretty. Chase Crawford is pretty. AND YES, I STILL THINK THE BADGE IS HOT. So, you know I'll keep watching unless the world crumbles and they stop being pretty or something.

It seems like each season of Gossip Girl has evolved in to something different than the last. I don't know what it is that keeps me attached to the show outside of Blake Lively and her hair of real gold, but it's something more than that that I can't quite put my finger on. Even now, after they have effectively ruined my ship (SHIP/RELATIONSHIP being the kicker her; usually my main reason for staying attached to a show). That's right, DAN AND SERENA. There, I said it. I still love them, even as whatever the hell they are now. But that's kind of irrelevant here too. Also irrelevantly, the Chuck and Blair show which I feel like it's trying to become 85 percent of the time. I know my opinion on that subject is very much the minority, and the problem is, I DO enjoy them. I just don't understand why people feel like the show has to BE ALL ABOUT THEM. Gossip Girl has always been an ensemble show, with Blair and Serena being the hearts and two polar opposite grounding rods at the center. It's always been about a girl coming home to find redemption and another looking for a reason to want to be redeemed. Very unlike the books, which were about, aww hell...I don't even know what the books were ever about. But in reality, none of that was my point, besides the fact that the only thing I'm really interested in is Serena. The show is still entertaining, and I still love the complete irreverence of it all, but there also has to be a heart. And the heart is still there, even if you have to look a little harder to find it. It's there in Blair and Chuck, even when I don't want to admit it. And in Rufus and Lily and Gay Eric and his BFF J.Humph. (IT IS NOT HOWEVER IN CREEPY SCOTT AND HIS STUPID PLASTIC FACE OF STUPIDITY) And it's there in Serena, where it's always been.

( more, if you want to read it ++ PLUS PICTURES AND POETRY )

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Oh a related note. I did plan on writing all about what I thought of last weeks season premier of Gossip Girl, but look! It's Monday again and I ran out of time. Oh botha...

I guess I'll just have to note a few short things and get back to really looking at the moral and social relevance of the episodes this coming week. I mean, after all, if you can't look to Gossip Girl for a moral compass, then what good is life at all?



( hey, i remember you )

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It's nice to have TV back. I like TV.

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My life has been pretty consistently boring lately. I'm stuck in a little state of uncertainty with the boy I've been seeing. Not sure whether it's going to move to the next level or kind of stall out where it is. I'm not sure if he knows either. We've been busy lately, maybe that has something to do with it.

The only non-boring part of my life is my little man Rowan. He never ceases to bring the LULZ. The other day I was with him and he had a little scrape on his knee. I'm talking, two tiny scratches. He was really intrigued by this, and he kept holding his knee and showing me and telling me to look at his "boobie." And then he would ask me to kiss his "boobie". And I'm like, you have a booboo on your knee? And he would nod and say yes, he had a boobie. AWW THAT KID. I BREAKS MY HEART HE IS SO FLIPPING CUTE. He also said that I was his best friend the other day. I'm not sure he knows what that means, but he said "Sar's my best friend." It's hard to understand, but it killed me!

Poll of the CENTURY!

Poll #1451880 Important Life Questions
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 16

Which version of B.Live is better?

Today seems like a good day to update, yes? Yes.

First and foremost, let me start out by saying HAPPY BIRTHDAY to the lovely glassbomb!!! Britt, you are such an amazing girl and have become such a wonderful LJ friend to me in the short time we've known each other! I hope this year brings you all the best because you totally deserve it! I MADE YOU SOMETHING FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY:



Okay, so I didn't really make that. And I didn't make him either. But isn't Chasey such a pretty girl?! You can look at that gif that I didn't make all you want, it's my present to you!
Happy birthday!

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I did stumble across some pretty fantastic new music recently. It was just by chance mind you. I was looking (cough illegally cough) for something else that I don't believe I ever found, and instead I found this little band. They kind of remind me of a mix between Bon Iver and Sigur Ros. It's slow, and melodic and quiet and very pretty and I highly recommend it for...PEOPLE WITH EARS AND STUFF.



I still haven't forgotten about that project that I started months ago where I was going to post about my top ten albums of all time. Yeah, I got through about...two? I can't remember, something like that. I'm going to finish it before....THE END OF THE WORLD. That is my goal before the world ends. To post about the remaining 8 albums that I had all planned out. I haven't been lazy...not really. I've just been...well, lazy.

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I have been...pretty consistently going on dates with a person. But, we haven't talked for a few days and I'm okay with that. Is that a sign that I don't really like him and was just dating him because I felt like I should? Or is it a sign that I'm just that kind of laid back and chill girl? I'm so terrible at these things.

This is the time of summer when I feel lazy and unmotivated and just blah. It's like, I want a change but I don't know what to change and I want something different but I don't know what I want. Maybe it's just the heat and the long days. Or maybe it's real and this is just the time when it strikes me the most. Another year will go by and I will be in the same place thinking, wasn't this the year that everything was going to change? Only to realize that I felt like it should have, but everything is just the same. Maybe next year....

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aoineko is quite frankly, awesome and amazing and really, really super...all around and in general.

Lets just go ahead and put it all out there real quick. I'm not ashamed. I take my pleasures where ever I can get them.
Yes, I did by the Gossip Girl season 2 DVD's that came out. I feel fairly justified in this decision despite the failing economy and the lack of Dan and Serena love.
How? How could you do this Sarah? That is what I hear you saying. Well, let me give you a few reasons...

1.
Nate gets naked and becomes a whore. Both scenarios provide many good times for me.

( oh this is not dial up friendly, but worth it...TO ME )

I think I have listed twenty fully justifiable reasons for anyone to own the season 2 DVD's.

Hmm....what is this thing? How does it work? Livejournal? Is that you? Yes? Yes it is you?!
I barely even remembered that you existed out here in the lonely and vast world wide web.

I think I've become almost terrified of the internet. There's too much now. It used to be just good old LJ. LJ and occasionally MySpace when I wanted a good laugh. Now, there's facebook and twitter and tumblr and flickr and GOD, it's just too much. It's like, all of the sudden it's not good enough to just be in one place. You have to be at ALL places at ALL times and be funny and personable and have lots of friends and do cool things, and I think it's a big overwhelming, I have to say. So, the moral of the story is, I went in to hiding. I quite using my twitter, I NEVER go to facebook, and tumblr? What the hell is that? I try my hardest to keep up with my friends here, and I guess the point is, this is home. This is where I stay. I'm going to come out of hiding. I want to update again. I want to remember what it was like to not be afraid to write something and fear that it won't be good enough to keep anyone's interest before they run off to the next best thing and forget that we were ever all here, together! Maybe I just get overly stimulated. Maybe I'm not interesting enough to update so many different....things! Or maybe, maybe I hate change.

It doesn't seem to matter. The point is, I'm still here, and this is where I'll stay. So if you want to find me, then you'll have to come to LiveJournal because it's all that I know and I think that's probably the way it's going to remain. I will conquer my fear of not being enough, or doing enough, and simply embrace what I am and what I have to offer.

I kept thinking, I have nothing interesting to say. Nothing important. No awesome pictures! NOTHING NOTHING! And then I realized that not all of my journal posts have to be some kind of life changing set of prose, or a beautiful photograph of a butterfly in flight! I mean, sometimes I can just post stupid things! I used to do it all the time! I need to get back to basics dudes!

SUCH AS THIS:

If there was one moment of Season Four of It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia that was more memorable than Charlie jumping out of a moving van, it was undoubtedly "The Nightman Cometh," the hilarious rock-opera spoof/play-within-the-show from the season finale. After a sold-out live performance of the play in Los Angeles, the cast agreed to do a limited-engagement, nationwide tour this September.

Charlie, Mac, Dennis, Dee and Frank will all be reprising their roles, and The Waitress and Artemis are slated to join in as well. Come one come all, to a beautiful show! It's gonna be awesome, and some other stuff! We can only pray no one has to pay the Troll Toll to get in. 

Tickets are now on sale for "The Nightman Cometh." Dates:

September

15 - Boston, Mass. @ House of Blues Boston

16 - New York, N.Y. @ Beacon Theatre

17 - Philadelphia, Pa. @ Tower Theater

22 - Seattle, Wash. @ Moore Theater

24 - San Francisco, Calif. @ Nob Hill Masonic Center

25 - Los Angeles, Calif. @ Hollywood Palladium

Hmm...all so very far away from me! Why no Chicago?! CONSPIRACY! I would so be there, SO BE THERE in a heartbeat. I have so much freaking love for this show. It has been on constant repeat for me this summer. Along with the band Pela, and No Reservations and old episodes of Scooby Doo. I have read (Time Travelers Wife right now, must finish before Friday). I have seen several movies...all bad, including GI Joe. With the exception of Harry Potter which was fantastic. POINT BEING. I seriously need to try to find a way to get to Philly or Boston. Preferably NYC so I can stalk find some Gossip Girl filming locations. YES, I'M STILL THERE. HAVE SYMPATHY. I LOVE BLAKE AND BADGE. IT WILL NEVER END. I AM TRAPPED.

Summer is good. It's hot and warm and nice and tan and pretty. How is it already August?

I wonder, if Dentist's look inside of peoples mouths and think about how disgusting they are. Like, the little veins and the the moistness, and just the general disturbingness of mouths. Like, I'm not even talking about people that go to the dentist and like never brush their teeth or anything. I'm just talking about mouths in general. I had to go to the dentist yesterday and I unsuccessfully had three cavities. I'm not really sure how that happened. I'm guessing it's probably my out of control addiction to Diet Coke, but what the heck am I supposed to do about that? I have no desire to quit! I guess the cavities are just something that goes along with that. Even though there's no sugar, all of the fizziness and fake sugar can't be good for the teeth I'm thinking. But then, what do I know.

I mean, I'm no dentist.

Also, I wonder if dentists go to other dentists for their 6 month cleaning or if they're just like...hey, I'm a dentist, I'll do it myself thank you very much. My dentist has nice teeth. I think that going to a dentist that didn't have nice teeth might make me reconsider being a patient there. Maybe that's superficial, but common sense would say that if the dentist doesn't have nice teeth then there's really no way he can help you keep yours nice. Am I right? I also might have to have surgery on my jaw. Just a slight possibility. The TMJ that I used to struggle with really badly in high school kind of came back full force except worse and when I went yesterday the dentist was all like, "well I'm afraid that could be arthritis now, and the only way to fix it is with surgery. BUT, we're going to try to treat it for TMJ for now and get a mold for a new splint, blah, blah, blah technical stuff." I hope that it works because A. DO NOT WANT SURGERY. CAN NOT AFFORD. And B. I'm pretty sure that any kind of jaw surgery involves the breaking of bones, which sounds entirely too unpleasant to make it worthwhile.

Remember that little elf in Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer that wanted to be a dentist?

I had a pretty miserable weekend, if I'm really going to be honest. It wasn't like anything particularly bad happened, I just spent the majority of it feeling quite sorry for myself. One of those weekends where I was once again stumped with the never answered questions. Like, what am I doing with my life. I wanted to be married and have kids by now. Why do things not work out the way I planned? I'm getting older and nothing ever changes. I thought that I'd go places and do things and see things, and yet here I am. WHY am I still here? But if I left where would I go? And can I afford it? Why do I feel so alone all the time? What if I missed my chance at being in love and now I'm alone for the rest of my life? And the list just goes on, and on, and on, and on...

Yeah, it was one of those weekends. I can't say that I feel particularly better about any of it. But work does give me less time to think about it, and get worked up over it, which is a good thing I guess.
So, this was basically me for three days...



The weekend DID end on a good note though. FINALLY someone, somewhere, at Lifetime (and if I knew who they were I would kiss their feet), got the rights to Elvis and Annabelle with Blakey Bear and the forever intriguing Max Minghella.

Contrary to popular believe, I am NOT dead. I mean, technically I'm still really, totally alive. 100%

I'm back from Florida! Where the weather was rainy, rainy times 10. We had a couple of nice days, but other than that, the entire trip was mostly spent playing Harvest Moon on the Wii. Which, all in all, not such a bad way to spend a vaca. I'll be honest. I also read a really terrible book that made me wish that I would have not read the really terrible book and read the other only mostly terrible book that I'd brought along with me instead. But you know, that's life. Live and learn folks.

Other than that, I haven't really had much to update about lately. My life is boring. I did get to watch the season finale of Gossip Girl, which I DO plan on talking about at some point in time, but first I have to remember why I cared. Or, if I cared. I also watched Glee while I was gone, and I loved it. I've watched the pilot about fifteen times and can't get the music out of my head. Can't wait for more new episodes in the fall. I have also rediscovered my love for It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Doesn't matter how many times I've seen the episodes, I can just watch them over and over. Love that show. Started watching Flight of the Concords too, which I'm really, super loving. That was aoineko's fault, so I blame her.
I haven't seen any of the movies I've been wanting to see, not even Star Trek or Terminator. SERIOUS FAIL.

AND I am behind on my album posting, because I was gone for two weekend in a row. I do plan on getting back on the ball with that this coming weekend though. I have many more to get through!

Also, my Ro turned two a few weeks ago. I can't believe he's getting so big. Not only did he get a big kid haircut, but he also got his two year pictures taken and it's been confirmed that he's still the most adorable kid in the UNIVERSE.

New Haircut:



Big boy pictures:




(Dude, look at the tongue and the booty. He's such a balla.)

I finally, FINALLY attempted to go through some of my pictures from my trip. I mean, it's a ton of pictures. I don't even really know how I took so many pictures. Well, that's not exactly true. It was beautiful everywhere that I went and I felt like I should probably just take a picture every time I took a step. And I took a lot of steps, so there were lots of pictures.

I actually got a lot of great underwater shots on this trip, though I haven't gone through those yet, so they'll have to be in the next batch. It was hard enough to go through this first one and narrow it down to pictures that were halfway worthy of being shared!

Anyways, some pictures from my trip to St. John in the USVI about a month ago.

Well, the time has come. Let's talk about Gossip Girls. First of all, let me just put out this disclaimer, as I had some people unfriend me after last weeks recap. I love this show, I do. I enjoy it, I tune in every week, and I love my girl Serena and my boy Dan. But, I also find it hilarious sometimes, and I like to write things that don't make sense. So, please don't take offense to anything I write here. It's all in good fun! Really!

For anyone who missed Gossip Girl this week, Here's a little rundown with some pictures. I mean, I'm not sure if I was watching the same show as everyone else? But it was very insightful and I feel like I've pulled all of the major plot points together and created something really kind of coherent! So, let's do this shall we?

( This week on Gossip Zombies: )

Monday I'm going to be posting the first album on my list. I'm pretty excited to start this after all of this time.
Also, still trying to go through pictures from my trip so hopefully I will be posting a few of those soon too!